Prolog

by admin on April 17th, 2013

How many long walks we did in the evenings of this summer, lost so deeply in thoughts. You, wide-eyed watching the sky which turns slowly from a bright turquoise to deep dark blue, with last long-drawn-out lines of yellow and orange, which sometimes seem to entangle with featherweight clouds, a last goodbye of the setting sun. The landscape bathed in intense green, the smell of fresh mown grass and fruit trees in the balmy, soft summer wind.

You, enchanted, open with all senses, I just let you walk, how you want to walk. I let you watch everything while I’m watching you, again and again amazed by your existence.

You say „Wooow! I can see all that!!“ and I feel with you, how you feel yourself, enjoying every move, every breath, every view.

You say „I’m here…..that is so great, so wonderful“. But there is also a light grief in your words which slowly spread out inside. Sometimes you really not feel being there, I know.

How often we’d talked on these walks during the last two years about it, to write it down, what had happened? We, with each other, with our closest friends, you with the friends you have now?

Two years have passed. We tried. And overruled it again. I couldn’t do it for you.

So much had happened during this time. We shared and experienced so much together. I protected you. I suffered with you. I laughed with you. I learned from you. I dreamed with you. And found such a deep love for you inside of me about which I never believed I could ever feel it for you one day.

You would like to say so many things. About your life. About your thoughts. About what have happened to you. You want to give so much, still.

But..

All these many „but“. My doubts. You have lost so much memories. So much was already written about you during the last years. Facts. Lies. Hypotheses. Bizarre, strange and crazy things. Annoying and shameful things. Words full of love and admiration.

Within which category would our story fall, that kind of story, you would like to see written down? Surely not under „facts“. Nobody would ever believe you. Neither you, nor me.

You’ve begged me such a long time now. I give up. So let’s go and write down a small fairy tale.

I gave you my life already. Now I give you my word.

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